I Thought He Meant James Brown At First

I'm not saying I agree with my friend Dubby 100% of the time, just that I disagree with him 80% of the time...

Enjoy Dublin O'Shea's first post of the new year!

Dublin reflects on life... and death.
By Dublin O'Shea

So recently someone died. Well, of course I know that people are dying every second all over the world. In some places, Death is even busier than in others (Sudan, Iraq, Flint etc...).
And death is celebrated/mourned differently around the world as well. Some folks party for days to celebrate the life of a loved one. Some drink themselves into oblivion (see the movie Snatch). Some people say hail Mary's and prayers with hopes of sneaking a loved one past the pearly gates. Others do tribal dances and whoop and holler and shake their dicks. The point here is that death has a lot of meanings. Besides the obvious one which is that the person in question has ceased to exist in this mortal realm.
But one thing I've often noticed is that after a person dies, people never remember all the shitty things that person did during the course of their life. There are a few exceptions of course. Most notably would be Stalin, Hitler, and Hussein. But even these people are probably remembered with love and adoration by some. Not me, mind you. But the world is full of wackos.

Now I know that we shouldn't focus on the bad habits or faults of other people. The world should have some hope. People should get the benefit of the doubt. At least at first. However, if someone was an asshole in life, should we go so far as to forget about how much they sucked? Or worse, should we go so far as to say that they were actually a nice person? Or maybe even that we were blessed to have them in our lives? I think not.
What is it about someone dying that clouds over every selfish, jerkoff act they performed in their pointless existence? How is it possible for people to be so deluded? I'm so glad you asked.

I think it come down to this; if they admitted to themselves that their friend was an ass, they'd be forced to see that they themselves are asses for simply associating themselves with said ass. Did you catch all that? No? Let me go on then.
People live in a world of self-deception and pretence. They actually believe that their inaction in life equates into being a good person. They think that by not killing and stealing or raping the local wildlife, they've earned a first class ticket to heaven and a nice eulogy.

Well, I hate to be a naysayer, but let me tell you a thing or two about a thing or two. I think we should call it like we see it. If you are an asshole in life, you should expect people to talk some serious shit about you after you finally do us all a favor and kick the bucket. There will be no pretending here. No flowery funeral with nice eulogies or people getting drunk in your honor. When your number comes up, be prepared that your corpse may get a royal buggering in hell. This isn't a guarantee. Just know that I'm not going to be sad that you cease to be. I won't be heartbroken. You should've been nicer. That's what you get.
And if you were a big enough asshole to get hanged, and someone is around with a camera phone, there really shouldn't be an uproar if someone comments that they hope hell is hot enough for you. Let the video be shown you damned pansies.
In closing I would like to leave you this friendly reminder. Don't be an asshole. If you fail to heed my reminder, don't be surprised if someone pisses on your grave. I might even pitch in for a tasteless gravestone. Kickstart my heart baby. Kickstart my heart.

Love always,
Dublin